Coming to the decision that your parents may be better accommodated in senior housing is difficult. Even more difficult is having to sit down and talk to your parents about moving to a senior housing facility. How do you let them know how you feel without making them feel insecure or incompetent?
Talk To Your Parents In Advance
Before your parents require senior housing, it's a good idea to discuss their feelings about it, as well as your own. This is a talk that families should have, regardless of whether they think they will ever need it or not. Talk about the available options, as well as what each person is comfortable with. Do some research together to dispel myths, as well as to discover the most favorable options.
Treat The Move As Any Other Housing Search
The prospect of moving to a senior housing facility actually can be fun and exciting if it is looked at just as any other home search. Discuss decor, furniture and more. Look at places that not only meet income, safety and health requirements, but also are attractive to your parents. Many senior housing facilities are just as attractive and have the same amenities as many other housing communities. They simply have added safety and health benefits unavailable elsewhere.
Listen
Yes, talking with your parents about moving to a senior housing facility is important, but so is listening. Let your parents share their thoughts and concerns. Even if you disagree, let them say all they want to before you respond. They need to know that you care about their feelings. Remember that this is their future home you are discussing, not yours.
Express Your Concerns Without Pushing
Once your parents have let you know their thoughts, let them also know yours. But do not express feelings in a way that is argumentative or judgmental toward their ideas. Present your concerns in a peaceful manner that does not indicate your way is the only way to do things. There are a variety of options when it comes to senior housing facilities, so you need not push your parents into choosing the exact facility that you had in mind.
Discuss What You Plan To Do When You're Their Age
One great way to talk to your parents about moving to a senior housing facility is to instead discuss what you will be doing when you are their age. Discussing your personal preferences could lead to a discussion about theirs, and everyone could learn something new. You might be surprised to find out that they agree with you, or that they already have plans regarding senior housing.
Accept Their Decisions
Unless senior housing is an absolute necessity for your parents due to health or safety risks, you need to accept their decisions. This is important, whether you agree or disagree with them. Keep in mind that as adults, they still are free to make their own choices.